Episode 28

The Happiness Letter (Joseph Smith's Proposition to Nancy Rigdon)

Original Air Date: 2022-11-10 • Duration: 2h 56m

Happiness LetterNancy RigdonPolygamy

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This video features a discussion between host John Dehlin, Mike from "LDS Discussions," and "Nemo the Mormon" regarding Joseph Smith’s "Happiness Letter." The episode analyzes the historical context, content, and theological implications of a letter Joseph Smith wrote to 19-year-old Nancy Rigdon in 1842 as a proposal for plural marriage.

Here is a detailed summary of the video based on the provided transcript:

Historical Context and The Proposal

  • Background: By April 1842, Joseph Smith was already married to approximately 10 women 1. Following the excommunication of Oliver Cowdery—partially due to his condemnation of Smith’s affair with Fanny Alger—figures like Sydney Rigdon and John C. Bennett rose in prominence 2, 3. Nancy Rigdon was the daughter of Sydney Rigdon, a high-ranking church leader 1.
  • The Setup: The hosts discuss how Joseph Smith utilized Nancy Marinda Hyde to facilitate his proposal to Nancy Rigdon 4. Joseph had previously sent Nancy Hyde's husband, Orson Hyde, on a mission to Jerusalem and subsequently received a revelation commanding Nancy Hyde to "hearken to the counsel" of Joseph in all things 5, 6.
  • The "Private" Space: To secure a location for secret meetings, Joseph Smith evicted Ebenezer Robinson from the church printing office in the dead of winter, giving him short notice to leave 7. This location was then used for private meetings, including the proposal to Nancy Rigdon 8.
  • The Rejection: Joseph Smith invited Nancy Rigdon to a private room, locked the door, and proposed to her, claiming it was God's will 9. Nancy Rigdon refused the proposal 1. Following her rejection, rumors were spread—allegedly by Smith and his associates—characterizing her as a "public prostitute" to discredit her testimony 10, 11.

    • The "Happiness Letter" Analysis

    The video analyzes the text of the letter Joseph Smith wrote to Nancy Rigdon after her rejection to persuade her to accept the arrangement.

  • 1. The "Happiness" Hook and Modern UsageThe letter begins with the famous phrase: "Happiness is the object and design of our existence" 12. The hosts highlight that this specific line is frequently quoted by modern LDS leaders (such as Thomas S. Monson) as an inspirational teaching, often without acknowledging that it comes from a coerced polygamous proposal 12, 13. The church attributes the quote to Joseph Smith, contradicting apologists who claim John C. Bennett forged the letter 14, 15.
  • 2. Moral RelativismThe letter argues that morality is determined by God's immediate command rather than universal law. It states: "That which is wrong under one circumstance may be, and often is, right under another" 16.
  • Joseph uses the example that God said "Thou shalt not kill" but also commanded "Thou shalt utterly destroy" 16.
  • The hosts argue this teaches that "sin is not sin" if Joseph Smith says it is a commandment, creating a dangerous theological loophole for expediency 17, 18.
  • 3. The Solomon ContradictionThe letter defends the polygamy of Solomon, stating God gave Solomon "every desire of his heart... even things which might be considered abominable to all who understand the order of Heaven only in part" 19.
  • Mike points out that this directly contradicts the Book of Mormon (Jacob 2), where God explicitly calls Solomon’s wives and concubines "abominable" 20.
  • The hosts argue Joseph Smith effectively threw the Book of Mormon and its version of God "under the bus" to justify his own desires to Nancy 20, 21.

    • 4. The Apple AnalogyJoseph compares the situation to a parent whipping a child for stealing an apple versus giving the child the apple if they ask for it. He argues that if the child asks (obeys the commandment), "all the pleasures of the apple would have been secured" 19.

  • The hosts interpret this as Joseph telling Nancy that sexual relations (the apple) are only sin if done without his permission; if she submits to the "commandment," she can enjoy the "pleasures" without guilt 22.

    • 5. Spiritual Extortion and ThreatsThe letter alternates between promises of blessings and threats of eternal loss. It warns that "blessings offered but rejected are no longer blessings" and will be taken away 23.

  • Mike characterizes this as "spiritual extortion," noting that Joseph leverages Nancy's entire spiritual welfare against her consent to marry him 24.
  • The letter creates a false sense of urgency, stating "Tis Madness to defer," a tactic the hosts identify as common in high-pressure sales and manipulative coercion 25, 26.

    • 6. The "Liberal" GodJoseph writes that God is "more liberal in his views... than we are ready to believe" 25.

  • The hosts argue this is a manipulation tactic to circumvent Nancy’s moral upbringing, effectively saying that God is "cool" with things she previously believed were sins 27, 28.

    • Fallout and Conclusion

  • Public Exposure: John C. Bennett eventually published the letter, leading to a scandal 9.
  • Sidney Rigdon's Denial: Nancy's father, Sidney Rigdon, issued a statement denying Joseph wrote the letter, but the hosts analyze this as a "carefully worded" denial (stating it was not in Joseph's handwriting, which was technically true as he used scribes) to protect his position while not explicitly lying 29, 30.
  • The Hosts' Verdict: The episode concludes that the letter is a clear example of predatory behavior 31. They argue it demonstrates how Joseph Smith used his authority to manipulate a teenager, threatened her eternal salvation, and contradicted his own revealed scriptures to satisfy his personal desires 24, 32.

    • Episode Info

    Guests: Mike (LDS Discussions), Nemo the Mormon

    Related Article: LDS Discussions